The Observer, September 2, 2005
Volume XXXVIII, Issue 1
Sex & Dating: A Freshman's Guide to Dating
Welcome to Case! You may have been warned that the social and dating scenes at Case are lacking. As you nubile young men and women will soon find, most students at Case fall into two groups: those who sit around and complain about the dating scene, and those who are out there dating. Case's lackluster reputation is merely due to the fact that the former have more time on their hands, and therefore are the most vocal, while the latter are too busy having fun to advertise it to the rest of campus.
To avoid becoming yet another sad, stereotypical Case student whose only nighttime adventures include those on your computer screen, here are three simple tips to getting the most out of your freshman year, and your college years as a whole.
First things first: Sometime during your freshman year, have a fling. I promise, you will not regret it. I still remember my RA joking about the "incestuous" nature of same-dorm hookups, but I wouldn't give up my hallway makeout memories for anything. After all, nothing beats knowing that if you're having a bad day, there's someone down the hall willing and ready to make you feel better.
That said, don't overdo it. Remember: practice makes perfect, but too much practice makes a slut. In addition to learning time management, you need to learn nookie management. You want to be known for strutting your stuff in class, not shuffling down the walk of shame on Saturday mornings. If you can name three other people that the cute guy or girl you're eying has been with, you might want to set your sights on someone who is a little less public property. If, on the other hand, other people can rattle off the names of three or more people that you've hooked up with, maybe you should order pizza with some friends and protect the campus from your insatiable desire.
Once you learn to balance your appetite for new meat with your craving for self respect, chances are that your free-spirited adventures might begin to center around just one person. Although it may seem like there are only advantages to having a steady hookup partner, this is a dangerous time. You must protect your life and the people in it to make certain that there is no danger of losing them, regardless of what happens with the new apple of your eye. Just remember the people that helped entertain you before Mr. or Miss Wonderful waltzed into your life.
The bottom line is, dating at Case is what you make of it. If you sit around complaining, you really won't have time to go out and find all of those desirable and attainable co-eds who are waiting to make your dreams come true. If, on the other hand, you decide to go out and do something after finding yourself dateless on a Friday night, you might find that you have something other than your single status on Saturday.
