The Observer, March 21, 2008
Volume XL, Issue 21
Equal rights should be afforded to all
Same-sex marriage isn't something most politicians want to talk about. Too often, Republicans use gay marriage as a tool to divide people and promote intolerance, simply to win elections. Not only is that disgraceful politics, it also represents an injustice to millions of Americans. Denying so many citizens the basic legal rights that come with marriage because of sexual orientation is wrong. As Americans, we should be embracing equality, compassion, and family values – no matter what that family looks like.
Equal protection of the laws is afforded to every citizen by our constitution. As a society based upon the equal treatment under the laws, no citizen should be relegated to second-class status. This broad concept may be difficult to apply in many circumstances, but the implication for marriage laws should be obvious. Our federal and state governments should recognize legal marriage rights for every person, regardless of sexual orientation. This isn't about preferences; we don't choose who we love. It's about being able to fulfill one of life's greatest gifts and basic human rights – sharing your life with another person.
Same-sex marriage is a difficult issue because it exists at the intersection of religion and government. We should try to disentangle religion from the legal rights ascribed to marriage. We all worship in our own way, but all must live under the same laws. The legal benefits of marriage should be granted to all citizens, regardless of sexual orientation, through the same civil union arrangements. Everyone, gay or straight, has the same legal rights. Churches and religious leaders are then free to recognize or ignore same-sex relationships and marriages without interference from the government. They are free to preserve the sacred institution of marriage as they see fit, without government interference. Not only does it satisfy equal protection, it restores a degree of religious freedom.
Some may want to compromise and create civil unions for same-sex couples, but also preserve the term and institution of marriage for straight couples. Even though this battle over terminology seems a little superficial, words matter. Separate is never equal. Obviously, the first priority is to get the same legal rights and recognition for committed same-sex couples as married couples. If that has to come in the form of dual institutions, then I'm OK with that. It's a step in the right direction.
In a country where half the marriages end in divorce and too many children are growing up with only one parent, we should be looking to expand and strengthen this important institution. Committed same-sex couples would make up more of the loving and dedicated families our country needs.
Even though gay rights remains one of the most contentious political topics of our day, I am sure that affirming them in our government can be done respectfully. I hope that as American culture becomes more tolerant, there will be more opportunities for progress and less open hostility. Poll after poll has confirmed that with each passing generation the stigmas and stereotypes associated with being gay lessen and support for equal rights increases. It is up to our generation to take advantage of this slow shift and push for equality. I'm convinced that it will be one of our generation's greatest struggles and one of its greatest accomplishments.
