The Observer

Sex and Dating: Keeping your affection in check

Miss Terri Reider

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It happens to the best of us. You’re sitting in a KSL cubby by the Austrian History section, glancing around at anything except your philosophy paper, and all of a sudden you are hit with…you know…urges.

Uh oh. What’s a student to do?

Don’t panic. First things first.

Whether you are or aren’t near your lover of choice, you need to take a second and consider a few things.

First, just how bad are these urges? Can your thirst for girth be satisfied with a trip to the vending machine for a Vitamin Water? If there is a way for you to squelch your desire for some rough and tumble action while you’re in a public area? The library is not an anatomy lab.

While in the seats of Strosacker during a movie or perhaps even in the lockable Village music rooms, sneaking in a little T&A is acceptable; however, what I’m getting at here is that there are certain places where it is appropriate to succumb to your primal urges, there are other places where it is not.

Whether you’re in the basement of Sears or the study rooms in KSL, keep the heavy petting at home. There are numerous benefits to this, most notably that you are more likely to have condoms in your bedroom than in your backpack (and if you do have condoms if your backpack you’re either very adventurous, very prepared, or over-eager). Waiting until you get to your dorm room or apartment has the added advantage of any extra items you usually like to incorporate into your sexy sessions.

On a less carnal note, it is commonly complained about via Facebook that couples enjoy playing tonsil hockey in the comfy chairs on the fourth floor of Nord and Sears.

While it may seem fine to you to lock lips with your significant other between chapters (or, let’s be honest here, paragraphs) of microbiology, the people in the chairs next to you may not find your afternoon delight very tasteful.

Why not settle for a quick peck on the lips before parting ways instead of awkwardly trying to part your partner’s blouse? PDA can be a tricky thing, but if you keep it to hand-holding, hugs, and quick kisses, the chances of you creeping out your peers and professors are greatly reduced.

You don’t want the phrase “great at writing papers while groping his girlfriend in public” showing up on your letters of recommendation.

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Sex and Dating: Keeping your affection in check