Major spoilers for “5 Lesbians Eating a Quiche.”
From Sept. 25-27, Players’ Theater Group (PTG) staged the unpredictable and beautifully absurd “5 Lesbians Eating a Quiche,” their first full-length play of the year. Therefore, five Observers, driven by curiosity, were also in attendance.
It’s the year 1956, and the Susan B. Anthony Society for the Sisters of Gertrude Stein have gathered for their tradition of the Annual Quiche Breakfast. This is a sacred occasion that everyone in the Society looks forward to, and it would be insane should any sister not bring a quiche to the event (Marjorie’s days are numbered). What was supposed to be a happy day went sideways when the air raid sirens crashed the party, signaling the end of the world. The missile-proof headquarters proves to be a safe haven from the attack, thanks to the work of Events Chairwoman Vern (Maya Zimmer), but now the sisterhood remains isolated from the rest of the world. So brings the introspective revelations and the question of survival—and whether the group has enough eggs to last the four long years they will be locked away. After all, “the egg is as close to Jesus than any food can get,” according to Lulie (Shriya Myneni).
Riya Kulkarni, Life Editor: 4.75/5
“5 Lesbians Eating a Quiche” is exactly as zany as the title indicates. It takes a unique cast of characters to whole-heartedly commit to the egg nearly as strongly as they swear off men and meat. Each one commits to the values of the sisterhood in her own, uniquely crazy way. Lulie refuses to waste her own eggs so she chooses to get pregnant, Ginny (AJ Williams) completely dissociates into a euphoric state when left alone with a quiche, Vern commits to the role of Events Chairwoman very seriously and remains protective over the sisterhood, Wren (Johanna Perry) is the glue that holds the sisterhood together and Dale (Tanya Clemens) refused to speak to a man after an incident at the beach when she was three years old. This last story was told through a well-delivered monologue by Clemens, who brought to life Dale’s family with facial expressions and voice changes to sell the part. Clemens was isolated from the rest of the cast with a bright spotlight overhead, and her delivery was both comedic and somewhat sad. It was hard to stop laughing from the sheer absurdity of the story in the first place (a bad experience at the lake after learning that women could not swim) to actually process how sad it was that Dale had dealt with so much loss at such a young age. This concrete establishment of characters was aided by the prevalent audience interactions that made this show so unique. At the very beginning, four of the sisters leave the stage to talk to the audience in character. Later, audience members were called by their name tags provided at the beginning of the show to participate in a group declaration that everyone was truly a lesbian. This immersive experience drew people in, and time passed with the audience none the wiser.
Neelanjana Komanduri, Photo Editor: 5/5
Players’ Theatre Group’s rendition of “5 Lesbians Eating a Quiche” was a hilarious, eccentric and clever show that never stopped making me laugh. They delivered clever innuendos through drawn out metaphors for various mature themes. I was compelled by their ability to immerse us within this simultaneously serious and unserious show about quiche (the most glaring innuendo of them all) through stellar acting and audience engagement. They practically made us part of their society after encouraging the entire audience to proclaim that we’re lesbians. I’m genuinely impressed by the actors’ ability to hold it together while delivering all of these priceless lines, such as when they claimed that their society was against both men and meat. It was impossible to predict their next move. I could’ve never guessed that one of the members would suffer a bloody death to radiation, or that another would be pregnant with a boy destined to repopulate America. What started as a group of old-timey women eating quiche ended as a society of lesbians making statements with double meanings so overtly sexual that the audience couldn’t stop laughing. For instance, they kept talking about how they were averse to putting sausages in their quiches. As a vegetarian, I wouldn’t like that very much either, but it’s pretty obvious that vegetarianism wasn’t the goal here. The jokes went beyond the script. The actors were masterful at sneaking in facial expressions in scenes—such as when they were fighting over the quiche—that made the dialogue that much more ridiculous. I wish I had the sly comedic ingenuity of whoever wrote this show. By the latter half of the show, everything they said made me laugh, go wide-eyed with astonishment, or both. Plot twist after plot twist, innuendos were no longer just innuendos and chaos broke loose for good. Suffice to say, this was the first play I saw at CWRU and if every show makes me laugh as much as this one did, I might be spending a lot more time in the theaters.
Anya Lin, Director of Business: 5/5
Watching “5 Lesbians Eating a Quiche” was an immersive, almost psychedelic experience where each scene was more peculiar than the one before it. Even Co-Directors Ada June Howard and Aliaksandra Turchak found it almost too ridiculous to attempt before warming up to its empowering themes. “We read it several times and realized it was not just about this like craziness and silliness, and it was actually like the play’s conveying some really important messages…that women can live in a world without men just fine,” they noted. More than just its chaos and feminist messaging, what made me love the show even more are the behind-the-scenes details. To my surprise, the “quiche” eaten onstage for each of the three shows was not a quiche, but a homemade vanilla cake recipe that took time to perfect. “AJ [Williams], the actor who played Ginny, experimented for weeks on end trying to figure out the best texture for the cake,” said Howard. Eventually, in the two weeks of full rehearsal, the cast (mostly Williams) ended up consuming around 10 cakes. Apparently, the cast found it delicious, and Myneni was always vying for another forkful. “I was always just like a few more bites, a few more bites,” she said. “It’s not acting; it’s fully real.” This dedication to the production, even to details as minute as the texture of the prop, was palpable from my seat and gave this show the vitality it needed to shine.
Kiera Ng, Director of Design: 4.78/5
Never have I ever considered that I would be sitting in a room watching a show called “5 Lesbians Eating a Quiche,” and yet I couldn’t recommend a better way to spend a Friday night. Not only is it a comedic, immersive experience, it also sheds light on widespread gender inequality in the mid 20th century. Full of satire and layers of symbolism, the show left the audience pondering the true meaning of eggs, posing and sisterhood on the walk home. By addressing the crowd as though we were a part of “The Susan B Anthony Society for the Sisters of Gertrude Stein,” and later having us all come out as lesbian loud and proud. These elements of the show kept the audience engaged and entertained, unsure if they would be the next one to be called out for not bringing a quiche (sorry not sorry, Marjorie). Set in a bomb shelter of a quiche-loving community, the show highlights the never-ending list of expectations society places on women. One such expectation is a woman’s need for a man to solve her problems. Through planning, teamwork and honesty, the sisterhood had already planned out a way to survive the next four years and repopulate the world, without needing a man to lead the way. While their methods for surviving and repopulating were questionable, they were making do with what they had in a bomb shelter and 57 widows—well, lesbians. After the bomb had dropped, you could feel the tone shift and society’s expectations being lifted, bringing hope for an accepting and freeing world. “5 Lesbians Eating a Quiche” brought to life the meaning of girlhood through satire, crowd interactions, teamwork and their motto: “No Men. No Meat. All Manners.”
Penelope Cloonan, Executive Editor: 4.79/5
“5 Lesbians Eating a Quiche” is a lot of things, but boring is not one of them. PTG is no stranger to odd shows. They value treasures such as “Neofuturism,”30 student-written and performed plays in 60 minutes, and the Starkid Productions musical “The Trail to Oregon,” a musical parody of the videogame, “The Oregon Trail,” performed just last spring. The heart of student theater is bizarre yet, somehow, “5 Lesbians Eating a Quiche” feels like a natural evolution.
All five lesbians (plus the 57 in the audience) were present, accounted for and deeply funny, but Vern certainly stole the show. Donning capris and a can-do attitude, Vern was probably the most traditional lesbian on stage. From her first few moments on stage, every other word out of her mouth was an innuendo while the rest of them were an ego trip. Vern’s dialogue walks a narrow line between being hilarious and uncomfortable, but through sheer force of Zimmer’s acting talent, it works. I would trust no one else to turn my meeting room into a Cold War-era bunker.
“5 Lesbians Eating a Quiche” is camp, while still being sincere. There is real love between those women, and not all of it is comedically erotic. When Lulie announces her pregnancy, the group gets over themselves despite the previous animosity from the group and launches into problem solving mode quickly. Dale is willing to risk her life to bring her sisterhood quiche and you can feel the emotional weight of her sacrifice over her irradiated explosive death. Being a part of that audience and being welcomed into the loving lesbian sisterhood was a feeling like no other. While the production was otherwise stellar, I must dock points for Marjorie’s inclusion. Marjorie, you know what you did.