The word “self-centered” means “preoccupied with oneself and one’s affairs,” and our society tends to have a negative perception of people described this way. They are perceived as too self-absorbed, only caring about themselves and completely disregarding others who live alongside them. However, it is necessary that we primarily focus on ourselves rather than being swayed by our surroundings. Perhaps there is nothing wrong with being self-centered.

Being self-centered enables you to advocate for yourself against mistreatment. When we care for other people too much, we accommodate their point of view, making numerous attempts to adapt even if we disagree with them. Being self-centered enables us to stand our ground and makes it easier to embrace our negative feelings about other people’s misbehavior. For instance, if what someone said offends you but most people don’t find it offensive, you are likely to think that you are just being sensitive. However, this is not necessarily true. Being self-centered serves as a reminder that you are offended and do not want someone to behave that way again. This allows us to disregard other people’s opinions and not be afraid to politely fight back.

Being self-centered gives us an opportunity to get to know ourselves. While we consume a lot of information about others and their interests and preferences, we spend less time thinking about what we like as individuals. Although it is important to accept other people’s interests to form close relationships, we often spend too much time trying to fit into social norms. In an effort to fit in, we try to learn what is trending and popular. We also try to force ourselves to like trends even when they are not our cup of tea. By doing this, we lose the uniqueness that sets us apart from others, and everyone becomes a clone. Being self-centered and prioritizing what we like, rather than what other people tell us to like, lets us discover new things about ourselves and gives us a better understanding of how to navigate our lives.

Being self-centered also allows space for self-improvement. As we get to know ourselves more, we begin to notice the strengths and weaknesses we missed by spending too much time caring about other people’s opinions. Our traits can either help or harm us. For instance, having a lot of knowledge about niche topics can save us by giving us a rare skill set in a necessary moment. It could also harm us if we decide to prattle on to our friends who do not care about the subject one bit. By being self-centered, we can decide which areas of our lives need improvement and how we are going to make them. Additionally, we can alter our deeply-rooted shortcomings by being wary of and intentional with the way we act and speak.

Lastly, being self-centered lets us take good care of ourselves. Instead of wasting time satisfying others or worrying about things that are beyond our control, we can use this energy to take care of our priorities—such as school and work—navigate our feelings, do things that we originally did not have time for, exercise and rest. Worrying, stressing and feeling anxious takes up a lot of energy, and worrying mainly about ourselves can help cut out a lot of the underlying sources. Acknowledging the fact that a lot of things are beyond our control and figuring out ways to accommodate them can be a stepping stone in the right direction in life.

Being focused on yourself does not mean that it is okay to be disrespectful to others and inhibit other peoples’ freedom and well-being in the pursuit of yours. However, being able to say that what is true for a lot of people may not be true for you, using your time in a way that is beneficial to you and not others and getting to know yourself at your own pace is a huge accomplishment that can help you in so many ways.