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Case Western Reserve University's independent student news source

The Observer

Case Western Reserve University's independent student news source

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Sex and Dating: Reject with Respect

Sometimes the hardest part of a breakup isn’t losing the person you’ve loved dearly for months – it’s the onslaught of not-so-suitable-suitors afterwards.

As any decent-looking college-aged female can tell you, guys come out of the woodwork (or your pile of Facebook friends) as soon as they find out you’re single.

After hanging out a couple of times and feeling no connection (I could never date a guy who doesn’t like Star Wars, let’s be serious) it’s time to let them know it’s not going anywhere. The issue is, how do you let them down gently?

The first thing to keep in mind, when you realize you aren’t interested in someone who thinks you’re his Frodo Baggins, is that he still deserves respect. You don’t want to be known as the person whose go-to rejection tactic is writing something to the effect of, “Hey, you’re great (not really) and I enjoyed hanging out with you (because there were other, more attractive people there I could stare at), but I just don’t think this is going to work (now or ever)” on a now-ex’s Facebook wall for all the other hobbits to see.

The best way to let someone know you aren’t interested isn’t to ignore them either, especially since our campus isn’t vast like the Sahara that is most people’s dating lives.

When approached by the object of your non-desire while lunching in Nord, I do not advise you to run away screaming “Stranger danger!” Not only will this make you look like a crazy person, you will probably hurt your suitor’s feelings. Which is, like, not good.

So you’re asked if you want to get together and watch some scary sci-fi movies. Politely decline by saying something like, “Thank you for the invitation, but I’m not interested.”

Sounds easy, right? It is! Unless that person hears “thank you for the invitation; please keep asking me to hang out and one day I will say yes.”

This happens more often than you would think – or maybe not, considering Case Western Reserve University has a demographic healthy enough to merit a course in “how to interact with people who aren’t on the other side of a computer.”

While it may be difficult to feign politeness to someone who has been bothering you nonstop for the past month, it is necessary in order to avoid the unpleasant reputation that comes with treating people like the creepy Furby your great aunt got you for your 20th birthday.

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